We need another vote to get this forum going again... Everyone nominate your list of least favorite nba personalities (from coaches to players, to announcers, etc.) and then we will put together a poll of the top ten or so... (As a side note, I was going to do least favorite broadcast teams, but not everyone has league pass and/or lives outside of SA to be able to see all the other teams. I will make it easy for you--Denver, Celtics, and Milwaukee are in a three-team race for that one...)
Here is my list of least favorite NBA personalities:
1. Kevin Garnett
Everything from punching teammates and proclaiming himself the best player in the league should be enough to make this list, but it is his barage of f-words before the jump ball every game that really gets to me. Duncan's facial expression is always classic during this little pregame ritual--it's like a high school senior at a junior high dance watching kids doing the running-man. Oh, yeah, and Kevin, the pregame rosin-magic-poof-of-powder-thingy is over. Noone thinks it is cool or clever anymore. Even his own broadcast team is annoyed.
2. Tommy Heinsohn
(Celtics "legendary" broadcaster.) Stop smoking, stop sleeping with Paul Pierce, and start realizing that your stupid "Tommy Points" pretty much ruin the game for anyone who has paid for NBA League Pass. This guy really believes in his heart that (a) the Celtics never commit a foul, and (b) if Paul Pierce ever misses a shot he must have been fouled. One of the worst broadcasters in the history of talking, ever, period.
3. John Mason
You are D-d-d-d-d-d-d-dumb. If Detroit fans weren't so cliche and desparate for a break from their assembly-line jobs, you would be working at Ford putting bumpers on an escort. Plus, having open flames like that in an arena has to be unfair/illegal somehow...
4. Scott Hastings and Chris Marlowe
(Denver Nuggets broadcast team.) If Tommy Heinsohn didn't single-handedly put up the top 100 performances for worst broadcasting of an NBA game, these two would set the record every night. Scott: you sucked when you played, and you still have no idea what you are talking about when it comes to basketball. Aside from Tom Tolbert, generally white guys who sucked in the NBA don't make good commentators. Chris: you are NOT the coach--you are the play-by-play guy. Stop yelling at the players to push the ball. (I honestly think I saw Andre Miller turn and look at him one game when he was yellign that. Funny thing is Andre then started pushing the ball...)
5. Stephen A. Smith
(Do I really need to write anything here at all?)
6. Kenyon Martin
Is that some kind of scripture tatooed on his left breast? I would like to once see this guy actually get in a fight. I mean think about it--he has probably called out just about every player in the NBA at one time or another, and yet never has the balls to actually do something about it. I bet he would run, I really do.
7. Mike D'Antoni
All NBA coaches complain, half of them whine when they do, only D'Antoni actually borders on taking off his diaper, lying on his back and throwing a tantrum... Side note: shave that damn thing, Mike--it is making me sick.
8. Rip Hamilton
OK, Richard, can you EVER give someone credit when they beat you and shut you down defensively? Also, why the hell do you wear a size XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXL shirt everywhere you go (I saw him wear it in a SOFTBALL game of all places!) You could fit a small planet in that shirt. And why does it say "Rip City" on it? Doesn't that sounds like some kind of fart party or something? And finally, it absolutely MUST be illegal to keep wearing that freakish mask when you don't medically need it. The sharp nose on that thing is a dangerous object in a contact sport. Rip is starting to grow pubic hair under the top of it where it presses too hard agianst his forhead. I loved it last year in teh Finals when Bruce Bowen knocked it down so it was covering his mouth and neck--he was pissed. Everything about watching this guy on TV makes me want to turn the channel.
9. Fred Carter
(NBATV analyst.) Was this guy really a "coach"? Stop pointing your finger, smiling like a sex offender, raving about how good olden-age players are, and actually make a point now and then. And, oh yeah, look up some of the words you use before you say them--you have no clue what half of them mean apparently.
10. Robert Sarver
Suns owner, the guy who did the chicken dance to Duncan when he didn't play against them late last season. Sit your ass down--some of us have to see your antics on TV while trying to actually watch a basketball game...
11. Sam Cassell
I don't hate him as much now that he plays for the classy Clippers, but this guy still bugs me bad. I still recall after they beat Denver in the playoffs he stood on top of Denver's scorers table and did the "big-balls" dance. Is there a more disgusting show of competitiveness available? Also, get some orthodontics, dude--you look like a freaking alien.
12. Andre Aldridge
(NBATV recap anchor.) This is the guy who has the personality of cardboard, puts the emPHASis on all the wrong syLLAbles, and does the recap show for NBATV after all the games are over every night. The recaps go on for about ten minutes a piece, too, and include "nice" jumpshots and free throws in the second quarter, so we get a real chance to get to know this riveting personality. That aside, I wouldn't have had this guy on my list, if it weren't for one Spurs game last year, where NBATV did something "novel". They hosted the Spurs game in a living-room setting, with Aldridge and two other guys (one of them was the Steve Lavin look-alike) all shooting the bull about the glory days of basketball. The Spurs game was on in the background on a huge HD TV, but you couldn't hear any play by play at all, and never once did they talk about the game. I wanted to strangle Andre and his team.
13. Paul Pierce
He wouldn't be so hated for me if Tommy weren't always hollering, "that's another tommy point for Pa-a-a-a-uw Peeyus!" Listen, we all know you were stabbed once upon a time and it ruined your day. But stop scowling at everything and trying to play the bad-boy. If you wouldn't pout so much your team might be good.
14. Wally Szczerbiak
To start with, the guy has evil eyes--like actually black around the edges. He also is one of the most subtely nasty players there is. If he gets a hard foul, he will start setting cheap screens, throwing an elbow in the back of whoever goes around them. On top of that, he whines like Danny Ainge.
15. Mark Cuban
Not much needed here. Just cut your damn hair--you aren't in your 20's, and you are uglier than hell.
There are several others I could put on my list, but enough is enough. Please add to this and we can have a good vote before publishing our list of the least liked people in the NBA.
Here is my list of least favorite NBA personalities:
1. Kevin Garnett
Everything from punching teammates and proclaiming himself the best player in the league should be enough to make this list, but it is his barage of f-words before the jump ball every game that really gets to me. Duncan's facial expression is always classic during this little pregame ritual--it's like a high school senior at a junior high dance watching kids doing the running-man. Oh, yeah, and Kevin, the pregame rosin-magic-poof-of-powder-thingy is over. Noone thinks it is cool or clever anymore. Even his own broadcast team is annoyed.
2. Tommy Heinsohn
(Celtics "legendary" broadcaster.) Stop smoking, stop sleeping with Paul Pierce, and start realizing that your stupid "Tommy Points" pretty much ruin the game for anyone who has paid for NBA League Pass. This guy really believes in his heart that (a) the Celtics never commit a foul, and (b) if Paul Pierce ever misses a shot he must have been fouled. One of the worst broadcasters in the history of talking, ever, period.
3. John Mason
You are D-d-d-d-d-d-d-dumb. If Detroit fans weren't so cliche and desparate for a break from their assembly-line jobs, you would be working at Ford putting bumpers on an escort. Plus, having open flames like that in an arena has to be unfair/illegal somehow...
4. Scott Hastings and Chris Marlowe
(Denver Nuggets broadcast team.) If Tommy Heinsohn didn't single-handedly put up the top 100 performances for worst broadcasting of an NBA game, these two would set the record every night. Scott: you sucked when you played, and you still have no idea what you are talking about when it comes to basketball. Aside from Tom Tolbert, generally white guys who sucked in the NBA don't make good commentators. Chris: you are NOT the coach--you are the play-by-play guy. Stop yelling at the players to push the ball. (I honestly think I saw Andre Miller turn and look at him one game when he was yellign that. Funny thing is Andre then started pushing the ball...)
5. Stephen A. Smith
(Do I really need to write anything here at all?)
6. Kenyon Martin
Is that some kind of scripture tatooed on his left breast? I would like to once see this guy actually get in a fight. I mean think about it--he has probably called out just about every player in the NBA at one time or another, and yet never has the balls to actually do something about it. I bet he would run, I really do.
7. Mike D'Antoni
All NBA coaches complain, half of them whine when they do, only D'Antoni actually borders on taking off his diaper, lying on his back and throwing a tantrum... Side note: shave that damn thing, Mike--it is making me sick.
8. Rip Hamilton
OK, Richard, can you EVER give someone credit when they beat you and shut you down defensively? Also, why the hell do you wear a size XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXL shirt everywhere you go (I saw him wear it in a SOFTBALL game of all places!) You could fit a small planet in that shirt. And why does it say "Rip City" on it? Doesn't that sounds like some kind of fart party or something? And finally, it absolutely MUST be illegal to keep wearing that freakish mask when you don't medically need it. The sharp nose on that thing is a dangerous object in a contact sport. Rip is starting to grow pubic hair under the top of it where it presses too hard agianst his forhead. I loved it last year in teh Finals when Bruce Bowen knocked it down so it was covering his mouth and neck--he was pissed. Everything about watching this guy on TV makes me want to turn the channel.
9. Fred Carter
(NBATV analyst.) Was this guy really a "coach"? Stop pointing your finger, smiling like a sex offender, raving about how good olden-age players are, and actually make a point now and then. And, oh yeah, look up some of the words you use before you say them--you have no clue what half of them mean apparently.
10. Robert Sarver
Suns owner, the guy who did the chicken dance to Duncan when he didn't play against them late last season. Sit your ass down--some of us have to see your antics on TV while trying to actually watch a basketball game...
11. Sam Cassell
I don't hate him as much now that he plays for the classy Clippers, but this guy still bugs me bad. I still recall after they beat Denver in the playoffs he stood on top of Denver's scorers table and did the "big-balls" dance. Is there a more disgusting show of competitiveness available? Also, get some orthodontics, dude--you look like a freaking alien.
12. Andre Aldridge
(NBATV recap anchor.) This is the guy who has the personality of cardboard, puts the emPHASis on all the wrong syLLAbles, and does the recap show for NBATV after all the games are over every night. The recaps go on for about ten minutes a piece, too, and include "nice" jumpshots and free throws in the second quarter, so we get a real chance to get to know this riveting personality. That aside, I wouldn't have had this guy on my list, if it weren't for one Spurs game last year, where NBATV did something "novel". They hosted the Spurs game in a living-room setting, with Aldridge and two other guys (one of them was the Steve Lavin look-alike) all shooting the bull about the glory days of basketball. The Spurs game was on in the background on a huge HD TV, but you couldn't hear any play by play at all, and never once did they talk about the game. I wanted to strangle Andre and his team.
13. Paul Pierce
He wouldn't be so hated for me if Tommy weren't always hollering, "that's another tommy point for Pa-a-a-a-uw Peeyus!" Listen, we all know you were stabbed once upon a time and it ruined your day. But stop scowling at everything and trying to play the bad-boy. If you wouldn't pout so much your team might be good.
14. Wally Szczerbiak
To start with, the guy has evil eyes--like actually black around the edges. He also is one of the most subtely nasty players there is. If he gets a hard foul, he will start setting cheap screens, throwing an elbow in the back of whoever goes around them. On top of that, he whines like Danny Ainge.
15. Mark Cuban
Not much needed here. Just cut your damn hair--you aren't in your 20's, and you are uglier than hell.
There are several others I could put on my list, but enough is enough. Please add to this and we can have a good vote before publishing our list of the least liked people in the NBA.
